Category Archives: Lists

Nigel’s bucket list

You’ve read the list of possible deaths for Nigel, now Nigel wrote a list of things Nigel has to do before that.

  • Meet the Queen
  • Travel further than Australia
  • Move out of Nilson…I mean Nelson
  • Earn enough so that Nigel’s Dole money is cut off (Nigel really wants to know what it’s like to do something for money)
  • Post more than just lists on Nigel’s blog
  • Finish that quilting project
  • Publish that book
  • Hi-5 as many people as Nigel can
  • Think of more things to put on this list

…well that’s a lot of things to do before Nigel dies…Nigel is nervous…


Nigel’s death list

A list of possible ways that Nigel will die! Some of them are ways that Nigel wants to die. Others…not so much.

Nigel’s Death List

  • Asthma attack (Probably the most likely)
  • A result of something caused by the nails on Nigel’s right hand (The nails on 3rd and pinky are the longest!)
  • It’s too hard for someone to find a vacuum cleaner after 2011 (Nigel’s reactions are questionable and possibly go beyond ‘just allergies’ and one or more nearly led to serious injury.)
  • Overly privileged car drivers (Nigel has never tried for a license let alone driven a car properly. Nigel doesn’t trust cars yet)
  • Diet related (Diabetes being the most likely the way Nigel is going)
  • Cancer (Bowel cancer runs in Nigel’s family. Another reason to keep an eye on diet)
  • Alone 😦 (There are many things in Nigel’s house that terrify Nigel. Mostly cutlery and electrical things, but also the shelves. Nelson is due for earthquake and remembering what happened to poor Christchurch…)
  • Assassination attempt (For when Nigel becomes a rich and powerful ruler of the world
  • Some sort of incident to do with the process of building a nuclear warhead out of paperclips and chewing gum (Before Nigel becomes a rich and powerful leader)
  • The cat…(is 9kg…)

15 Reasons why Nigel really needs to blog

1. To show off crap Nigel made

As you all should know, Nigel likes to make things. Right now Nigel is into quilting.

2. To practice writing

Which is a good idea if Nigel wants to be published someday

3. Nigel is an attention whore and wants to be world famous

‘Nuff said.

4. This blog is a last resort to cure Nigel’s severe lonelyness


5. To get feedback from people all over the world.

Come on, be honest! Nigel needs to come to grips with reality.

6. Nigel needs money

No really. Nigel has no proper source of income right now. Can Nigel make money with a blog?

7. To tell Nigel’s family stuff

Send money.

8. Nigel is looking

Single! 🙂 Likes cats! A little hard to feed but doesn’t care if you don’t walk it.

9. Using this blog to plug everything Nigel does

Preforming at the Last Night of the Proms tomorrow night! Singing in a Barbershop chorus! I made some stuff! Selling succulents! ect!

10. As a platform for Nigel’s fundamental and extreme opinions

Cats are better than dogs. End of argument.

11. As a place to put videos that Nigel will procrastinate in making

Nigel wants to make videos…when Nigel gets around to it.

12. Post pictures

Nigel has an attractive face. No really.

13. Show off Nigel’s pets

Two cats. One dog. My place doesn’t allow cats or dogs…so I downgraded to their natural prey…two mice.

14. It gives Nigel something to do in the day

In between choir practice on Thursday night, volunteer work on Friday and church Sunday night (if Nigel hasn’t procrastinated it) Nigel is bored.

15. It stops Nigel from procrastinating things

Or is that…makes Nigel procrastinate things? Whatevs. Nigel will figure it out later.

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